Watch this video to hear Mary's story of becoming a life coach!
I grew up in a big, huge family. There were five boys, four girls, two parents, and zero boundaries. We did things like wear each other’s clothes, eat off each other’s plates, and sign each other’s report cards. 😉
When someone was upset, we were encouraged to stop whatever we were doing and go “see about them” until we made them feel better. I learned to take responsibility for other people’s feelings.
I didn’t know that I had no boundaries - I just wanted to be helpful and nice.
I went to college and dated a guy who really liked me. He wanted to get married, so I said “…yeah.” The marriage advice I received was to take care of him, try to make him happy, and put his needs before my own.
I was really good at putting his needs first, and I tried hard to make him happy. He was also really good at putting his needs first and trying to make himself happy.
There I was, taking care of everybody else, and I just couldn't understand why no one was taking care of me.
I started to feel resentful of the people around me, even good people who I loved. That’s the problem with having no boundaries: we end up hating the people that we love.
Then, I met a boy named Trey and everything changed.
Then, the thought occurred to me...
“Oh, my goodness...if Trey is born valuable, then what about me? What about each of us?”
My journey to healthy boundaries had three steps:
- First, I had to decide what was ok for me and not ok for me.
- Second, I learned how to communicate my boundaries with compassion.
- Third, I figured out how to follow through with my boundaries and practice real self-care.
How I Became A Life Coach
After earning my degree in Psychology from Emory University, I advanced my career as a social worker. For over a decade, I served individuals and families who struggle with mental health, addictions, abusive relationships, and trauma.
There is not much I haven’t seen. I learned to be trustworthy, empathetic, and solution focused.
When my youngest child was born, I took some time off and had the beautiful opportunity to ponder my career path, reflecting on who I wanted to serve and how I wanted to help them. Throughout my career, I had written hundreds of treatment plans for the people who were “identified clients” and facilitated family meetings for their loved ones and support networks.
I found that my heart was drawn to the family members around the person who was struggling...
I became a life coach to help women build confidence, set boundaries, and practice self-care. I see coaching as a vehicle to carry you from where you currently are to where you want to be, like Cinderella’s stagecoach.
The women I work with come to me feeling defeated, taken advantage of, and exhausted. Throughout our coaching together, I help them become confident, intentional, and empowered. I love coaching, and it is my honor and joy to witness the transformation of such amazing women.
Do you want to overcome people pleasing?
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